Assessment on Communication Skills in the Area of Speaking and Writing Essay Example for Free

Assessment on Communication Skills in the Area of Speaking and Writing Essay People talk face to face, and they listen to each other. They write emails and reports and read the documents that are sent to them Human beings are communicating. In both decoding and encoding messages, people spend almost 70% of communication time as speakers. (Jaime Gutierrez-Ang 2009). Communication is two way process by which information is exchanged between or among individuals through a common system of symbols, science and behavior (Martinez 1) Being a two way process, communication occurs in a orderly and systematic sequence wherein human beings are able to see and hear what transpires in their environment. As a process, communication is dynamic, adaptive and continuous. Being a survival mechanism, communication helps us develop to be unique persons, relating and cooperating with others. It satisfies our physical, ego, social and practical needs. It is indeed essential in life. (Mely M. Padilla et.al 2003) Speaking and writing are skills that have similarities. Both require the use of language symbols to express needs and feelings, they are both governed by the rules of semantics and syntax. Both are also expected to achieve communicative purpose- a degree of understanding, common knowledge and shared expectations. In speech, we monitor what we say by listening to the revised or connected ideas, while in writing, we monitor what we write by reading and rereading. Furthermore, the speaker and the writer should be able to determine how simple or complex and formal the statements should be. But there are differences in speaking and writing too. Writing differs in speech in several ways. According to Vygotsky ,e.f Hughey 1983, composing a written discourse is a â€Å"separate linguistic function differing from oral speech in both structure and mode of functioning. Even its minimal development requires a high level of abstraction†. Writing is significantly different from speaking because writing requires a more complex and difficult discourse. (Saymo, 2004.) In reflecting upon and surfing out communication skills, then think of communication as ways and means of gathering and relying information, and think of information as what there is to be gathered by any means that is consider the widest range of writing and speaking as you consider your communication skills. In relevance to the Department of College of Education, Communication skills of the students have to be enhanced. The researchers encouraged the department that through Speech Laboratory to measure the speaking skills of the students as well as the writing skills where in the teachers can identify where the strength of the students and of the their weaknesses are in the components communication skills in the area of speaking and writing. It is also an instrument to detect students’ potential in speech so that it can be developed and can be a product of the department in the area of speaking and writing. The researchers look forward for the program that can be developed based on the results of the study. It will be a universal program for the teachers to have the better and effective instructional materials. The researchers foresee the unbiased treatment of the teachers towards the students through the help of universal program. STATEMENT OF THE PROBLEM This study aims to determine the levels of communication skills of BEED Gen.Ed freshmen students of Carlos Hilado Memorial State College for the first semester academic year 2013-2014 as Basis for Program Development. Specifically, it will aim to answer the following specific questions. 1. What are the levels of Communication Skills of BEED Gen. Ed freshmen students in the area of speaking and writing when they are grouped according to: a) School Graduated b) Mental Ability c) Parents’ Educational Attainment 2. What are the difficulties in the components of Communication Skills of BEED Gen. Ed freshmen students when they are grouped according to: a) School Graduated b) Mental Ability c) Parents’ Educational Attainment 3. Is there a significant difference on the level of communication skills in the area of speaking and writing when they are compared according to: a) School Graduated b) Mental Ability c) Parents’ Educational Attainment 4. Based on the results, what program should be developed? HYPOTHESIS There is no significant difference on the level of communication skills of BEED Gen. Ed. freshmen students in the area of speaking and writing when they compared according to where school they graduated, mental ability and what their parents’ educational attainment. THEORETICAL FRAMEWORK Communication is the way to learn the person. If he is to be deprived of the chance to communicate with others, he should have sense of identity. It is through communication that one gets the chance for affirmation of self-concept and sharing of views about a variety of things among others. People relate socially with each other through communication. Personal communication is essential for a person’s well-being. Sufficiency or absence of communication has a bearing on one’s state of physical health. For one, stress is heightened or dissipated depending on communication or lack of it and the nature of its content. So as being a two-way process, communication occurs in an orderly and systematic sequence where in human beings are able to see and hear transpires in their environment (William Schutz). These statements emphasize the importance of communication in different area of human needs. Communication is very essential because human being develops their capability to speak through interaction with others. Especially the children ages 1-5, they are great imitators. They observe the actions of their parents, brother and sister, playmates and others. They tend to discover the words by their own through observation. According to George T. Wilkins Speech is the most important of all means of communication. In the great government politics, and in the expression of our own democratic rights, speech is also most important. Good speech is essential to participate in democracy. As to the students, speech can help express their feelings. It can help through participating in classroom discussions, reciting in classroom activities and reporting assigned tasks. Effectiveness in speaking is a climb to a ladder of seven steps (Eugine E. White and Claire K. Neudelider). The quote stated that the speaker should first analyze and know the audience that will listen. In connection to the communication skills assessment, the students that have difficulties in speaking will assess by the recommendations and develop program that this study aims to achieve. For further information, communication is the KEY which unlocks all the doors to a successful and fulfilling school life experience, to getting cooperation with your students, that allows us to feel understood, for resolving conflicts between teachers and students, to let students know what your needs are and how best to meet those needs, to fewer conflicts in the classroom and in the playground, to building self-confidence and self-esteem, to feeling listened to by your students, mutual respect in the classroom, to less resistance and more cooperation, to everyone feeling safe to be themselves and to have more fun in the classroom. (http://sydney.edu.au/science/uniserve_science/projects/skills/jantrial/communication/communication.htm) . These only prove that communication is really very important in life especially in the teaching and learning process. It is the key to open the teacher and student mind and their capabilities to speak and write well. C

Willy Loman, An Idiot with A Dream in Arthur Millers Death of a Salesman :: Death of a Salesman

Willy Loman, An Idiot with A Dream in Arthur Miller's Death of a Salesman   Ã‚  Ã‚   A common idea presented in literature is the issue of the freedom of the individual in opposition to the controlling pressures of society. Willy Loman, the main character in Death of A Salesman by Arthur Miller, epitomizes this type of person; one who looks to his peers and co-salesman as lesser individuals. Not only was he competitive and overbearing, but Willy Loman sought after an ideal that he could never become: the greatest salesman ever. Determined to make money, Willy became uncontrollable and somewhat insane. Through his dialogue and actions, Willy Loman portrays a character of insecurity, persistence, and unknown identity.   Ã‚  Ã‚   From the very beginning of his life, Willy Loman experienced problems with his popularity and personality. His last name is a pun on a "low man." He is at the bottom of the business world as an unsuccessful salesman. In addition, his theories on life and society prove to be very degrading, not to mention influential to his mind set every day. Willy believes that being well-liked and having a personal attractiveness, together, can bring success, money, and many friends. Ironically, Willy does not have many friends and many people do not like him. With a beauty unlike others, Willy thinks that doors will open and problems will all disappear.   Ã‚  Ã‚   As a salesman, Willy developed many hindrances that caused his mind to deteriorate. His life as a salesman was built on a dream that he witnessed as a child. At an early age, Willy heard of a salesman, Dave Singleman, who could make his living out of a hotel room. Singleman was very successful and when he died, people from all over the country came to his funeral. It was this ideal that Willy Loman sought after. All he ever wanted was fame, popularity, and a few friends. Unfortunately, when Willy died, not a single person went to his funeral. His life, one that was spent trying to become another person, namely Dave Singleman, was a waste as no-one even wanted to see him buried.   Ã‚  Ã‚   In reflection of his career with the Wagner Company, many other problems arose that forced economic difficulties on him and his family. He was determined to live by ideals that placed him above everyone else. It was with these lies and illusions that Willy's life began to lose its' air of

Effectively Communicating in an Interpersonal Relationship

Effectively Communicating in an Interpersonal Relationship To the newly wedded couple, It has occurred to me that our current generation seems to lack the ability to communicate effectively with in an interpersonal relationships and it is through cooperation, collaboration, and compromise that an effective flow of communication occurs. If we analyzing and studying the communication process of both sending and receiving information, we can improve our ability to communicate effectively between one another. To have a successful interpersonal relationship one must first interact with others, which is called interpersonal communication. † (Hybels, 2007) We spend most of our lives interacting with each other, with a dozen different reasons to talk to different people. We will tend to say things differently depending on who we are speaking too. So there is a lot more to communication that just putting words together and saying them out loud for the other person to hear. The ability t o communicate effectively takes real skill and learning this skill never ends, even in a marriage.Being able to communicate effectively is probably one of the most important skills a person can have in a marriage, as the main cause for divorce is the lack of communication between one another. You are the only person that can say what you want your spouse to hear, so if you don’t know how to express what you want to say or explain your intentions clearly, the other one could easily take what you say and turn your own words agains you. So the best way to avoid this situation is to be assertive in how you communicate.When I say you must be assertive, I mean you must express your feelings and ideas openly, honestly, and take responsibility for your actions. It is also being willing to listen to what the other one is saying and respect them no matter how different their opinions may be from yours. You also need to be able to recognizing the emotions in one another, as it is a very important first step to building a good relationship. If one cannot feel what the other one is feeling, then you simply cannot connect with them on a personal or emotional level and that can deeply hinder one’s relationship process.Interpersonal communication is important because of the functions it achieves. Whenever we engage in communication with another person, we seek to exchange information with them, we also communicate information through a wide variety of verbal and nonverbal cues. Spoken communication has huge effects on all aspects of our life, to including interpersonal relationships, just as speaking and telling our needs and wants verbally or non-verbally is a necessity for our daily lives.Within our daily lives of both work and home, when we exchange information with our spouse, our verbal communication is organized by our language, whereas nonverbal communication is not. We spend about 75 percent of our day communicating our knowledge, thoughts, experiences, and ideas to each other. (Allis, 2002) What we don’t realize is that a lot of our communication is not made up of the oral or written form but of the nonverbal form. In communications involving two or more people, our messages are sent on two levels simultaneously and if the verbal cues are not congruent with the nonverbal cues, then the flow of communication is hindered.Correct or not, if the receiver of the communication will base the intentions of the sender on the nonverbal cues that they recieved. Most couples believe that they will communicate better because of the fact that they are in a relationship with this person and the depth of their personal knowledge and connectivity. (Schoenberg, 2011) All of this is based on the assumption that your significant other understands your intent even though your verbal and nonverbal signals are not matching up. So you two have to be cognizant of the nonverbal signals that you send to each other.Nonverbal cues can be categorized in to two sections: vocal and visual. The vocal side of nonverbal communication involves timbre (quality and tone), pitch (inflection), intensity (volume), tempo (speed), rhythm, and pauses (silence). Whereas the visual side of nonverbal communication involves your eyes, face, body posture, and hand gestures. â€Å"Before a person makes an attempt to form an interpersonal relationship, they must decide what attracts them to that person. There are many factors that make up attractions to other: physical attractions, perceived gain, similarities, differences, and proximity are a few of them. (Hybels, 2007) As you too were attracted to each other from the start, it is common with most people to be attracted to each other by the way they look, some people might have certain distinct characteristics that they find more attractable then others. Tall or short, blonde or brunette hair, blue or green eyes, muscular or slender, or even freckles are many things that attract us to one another but if there is no attractions, you are going to be less likely to walk up to someone and strike up a conversation them.For example, I am covered from wrists to neck to waist with tattoos and I have found that they inhibit my ability to have a good first impression on many of the professors that I have had over the last several years of college. I didn’t notice it at first but over time I saw that I received a warmer reception and instruction from my teachers when I had long sleeves on but if I gave the instructor time to get to know me. I could slowly start to show tattoos and it would not affect how the instructor acted towards me.On the opposite side though, I have met very interesting and smart people that had just as many tattoos as I did because of the shared similarities that we had. The similarities and differences can be a major factor in determining if a relationship will be good for a person because at times we will find ourselves attracted to people that share the sa me culture basis that we do. It is not a hard reach though to see why people are often attracted to people who enjoy the same things as we do but people can also be attracted to the differences in personalities. For example, people who don’t like making decisions might be attracted to a stronger decision maker. Because these characteristics complement each other, they might help strengthen the relationship. † (Hybels, 2007) So keep this in mind when you two are communicating with each other and it seems that what you are trying to send in not being received properly, as your nonverbal cues or bodily language might be sending something entirely different. As important as sending the right signals both verbally and nonverbally, effective listening is just as important in any relationship.When one listens to another, it shows that you respect them and care about what the other person is trying to communicate. There are three important types of listening and they are active , critical, and empathic. (Sole, 2011) Active listening is assertive communication that develops a sense of trust, were the person talking gets the feeling that you know what they are trying to communicate is getting to you. In doing this, you two will build a stronger bond and trust each other more in what you say and do.Critical listening is an analytical and rational process of listening, in where you analysis what is being said, process the information, and make a judgement on what was meant. After one has been in a relationship for a while the critical listening will not be needed, as empathic listening will tend to take over. Empathic listening is listening to your spouse when they have an issue or problem that they just need to talk about and know that you are there to listen.So when you empathetically listen, you set aside your own feelings and concentrate on comforting you spouse in their time of emotional need. Once you can use empathic listening in your relationship, you will be able to reflect on what is being said and respond back on the same emotional level of the person communicating but empathic listening is something that takes time in a relationship and you cannot force emotions but you can just be there for your spouse.It is obvious that you too have already made the initial approach to each other but there can be times in you relationship that you will have to make the approach again because a new or different situation has developed. So it is good to know that once we have approached someone, the next steps of forming an interpersonal relationship would be our motives for communicating. Your motives for getting married can easily be seen if someone spends just a couple minutes with you two and you guys fit the text book definition of what motivates us for forming a relationship.As â€Å"we are motivated to form relationships for many different reasons such as, pleasure, affection, inclusion, escape, relaxation, control, and health. † (Hybels, 2007) If one is motivated by pleasure, he or she might want someone to watch the same movies, listen to music, or discuss things that they have in common. If one is motivated by affection, then finding someone who will give you the â€Å"affective affirmation† that you need.Regardless of what motivates us, if we have started to develop a relationship we have to decide how much of our selves that we want to share and at what point in the relationship do we share it. Another factor that would have been considered as well would be the proximity of each other, as â€Å"proximity is the close contact that occurs when people share an experience such as at work, school, or play. † (Hybels, 2007) But seeing as you to met in college and studied the same major, your proximity was really close and you too were able to hare a lot of really neat experiences together and still continue to do so. Speaking of sharing with one another, I would like to explain self-disclosure to both of you. As â€Å"self-disclosure is a process in which one person tells another person something he or she would not reveal to just anyone. † (Hybels, 2007) Self-disclosure in not just providing someone with information about yourself. Self-disclosure is about revealing a piece of yourself that others would not normally know or learn about you over time.It involves trusting a person with your vulnerabilities when your risk sharing this information but it is also a way of gaining more information from the person you are sharing it with and you want to be able to trust each other and predict the thoughts and actions of your spouse. When one shares information like this, we are able to judge the reactions of our significant other. So once we share this information, we can learn how they think and feel on certain situations or topics that would not normally come up in normal day discussions.It is also implied that once he or she begins self-disclosure, the other will fol low suit. Thus causing a mutual disclosure and deepening the trust between two people in a relationship, knowing that they except you for who you are. While self-disclosure can strengthen a relationship it can also damage it as well but it is not called the intensifying stage for nothing because a relationship can be damaged if he or she is pouring out their soul to you and you don’t like what they are hearing or if the self-disclosure comes to early in the relationship, it can be just as damaging.There are five stages that we go through when developing and strengthening a relationship, these are the â€Å"coming together† stages. The first stage is the initiating stage, which is characterized by nervousness, caution, hesitation, and a very high risk of rejection. The next stage is the experimental stage, where we seek out any common interests, experiences, and life goals. It is in this stage that you might of talked about both of your education and career goals, when you might want to start a family, and what part of the city you wanted to settle down in.The third stage is the intensity stage in which the couple begins self-disclosure in an attempt to strengthen their relationship but also make it more vulnerable to each other. If you didn’t notice, when you two first started dating, your conversations were usually on positive topics in both of your lives but as time when on and you began to trust each other and build bonds. So when both of you felt comfortable in expressing your needs, fears, and desires; your relationship was strengthened and the two of you grew closer together as a couple.I don’t really think you two had an issues with this though, as you guys seemed to attach yourselves to each other after only a month had passed bye and the beginning and continued use of your pet names for each other made all of us sick but we were extremely grateful (kidding) when both of you got that summer intern job together. You two did c ome back a stronger couple though, so that summer really did bring you two together more, which led you into the fourth stage.The fourth stage is the integrating stage, in which the couple begins to communicate and respond easily to each others feelings. This is the point where your personalities began merging into one and we always saw you two together. I don’t think there was a single party or gathering that both of you were there for but you two made a cute couple and it was just expected after a time. The final stage would be the bonding stage. At this point, the couple will make some sort of commitment that announces their relationship to those around them,† (Hybels, 2007) involving a lot of commitment and dedication to the relationship and to each other. Whereas you two decided to get married and finally move into that small house you both were drooling over but you do know that once you two decide to have a baby, you will have to find a bigger house. In all of th e stages discussed we all have decision to make, we can either continue to move forward to the next stage, stay in the same stage we are in, or terminate the relationship all together.No matter what we as individuals choose to do with our lives, we need to know how to communicate effectively to that next stage and we need to know how to handle and resolve conflict in any relationship we place ourselves in. â€Å"We can do this by conflict resolution, which is negotiating to find a solution to the conflict. † (Hybels, 2007) Depending on how a conflict is resolved it can produce a positive or negative result but it also helps to take a positive approach to any conflict resolution, where discussion is considerate and on-confrontational, and the heart of the matter is on the issues and not on the individuals. If this can be completed, then, as long as people are willingly listening to each other and explore facts, issues, and possible solutions properly, conflict can often be res olved effectively. Making interpersonal communication just like any other work of life, meaning that it must be practiced and utilized regularly to be successful and we must continually analyze and study it in order to improve our ability to communicate effectively in relationships.So if you relationship is to last a long time and be a healthy and happy one, it is important to maintain a constant and consistent flow of communication with your partner (Sole, 2011). I wish the best of luck to both of you and hope your future endeavors bring you as much happiness as the last ones did. Sincerely, Aaron Stamper Reference Allis, R. (2002). Non-verbal Communication. Zeromillion. com. Retrieved from http://www. zeromillion. com/business/management/non-verbal-communication. html Hybels, S. & Weaver, R. (2007).Communicating Effectively. New York: McGraw-Hill Company Inc. Preston, P. (2005). Nonverbal communication: Do you really say what you mean? Journal of Healthcare Management. Retrieved f rom http://proquest. umi. com. Schoenberg, N. (2011). Can we talk? researcher talks about the role of communication in marriages. Houston Chronicle. Retrieved from http://search. proquest. com. Sole, K. (2011). Making Connections: Understanding Interpersonal Communication. San Diego, CA: Bridgepoint Education, Inc. Retrieved from https://content. ashford. ed. Effectively Communicating in an Interpersonal Relationship Effectively Communicating in an Interpersonal Relationship To the newly wedded couple, It has occurred to me that our current generation seems to lack the ability to communicate effectively with in an interpersonal relationships and it is through cooperation, collaboration, and compromise that an effective flow of communication occurs. If we analyzing and studying the communication process of both sending and receiving information, we can improve our ability to communicate effectively between one another. To have a successful interpersonal relationship one must first interact with others, which is called interpersonal communication. † (Hybels, 2007) We spend most of our lives interacting with each other, with a dozen different reasons to talk to different people. We will tend to say things differently depending on who we are speaking too. So there is a lot more to communication that just putting words together and saying them out loud for the other person to hear. The ability t o communicate effectively takes real skill and learning this skill never ends, even in a marriage.Being able to communicate effectively is probably one of the most important skills a person can have in a marriage, as the main cause for divorce is the lack of communication between one another. You are the only person that can say what you want your spouse to hear, so if you don’t know how to express what you want to say or explain your intentions clearly, the other one could easily take what you say and turn your own words agains you. So the best way to avoid this situation is to be assertive in how you communicate.When I say you must be assertive, I mean you must express your feelings and ideas openly, honestly, and take responsibility for your actions. It is also being willing to listen to what the other one is saying and respect them no matter how different their opinions may be from yours. You also need to be able to recognizing the emotions in one another, as it is a very important first step to building a good relationship. If one cannot feel what the other one is feeling, then you simply cannot connect with them on a personal or emotional level and that can deeply hinder one’s relationship process.Interpersonal communication is important because of the functions it achieves. Whenever we engage in communication with another person, we seek to exchange information with them, we also communicate information through a wide variety of verbal and nonverbal cues. Spoken communication has huge effects on all aspects of our life, to including interpersonal relationships, just as speaking and telling our needs and wants verbally or non-verbally is a necessity for our daily lives.Within our daily lives of both work and home, when we exchange information with our spouse, our verbal communication is organized by our language, whereas nonverbal communication is not. We spend about 75 percent of our day communicating our knowledge, thoughts, experiences, and ideas to each other. (Allis, 2002) What we don’t realize is that a lot of our communication is not made up of the oral or written form but of the nonverbal form. In communications involving two or more people, our messages are sent on two levels simultaneously and if the verbal cues are not congruent with the nonverbal cues, then the flow of communication is hindered.Correct or not, if the receiver of the communication will base the intentions of the sender on the nonverbal cues that they recieved. Most couples believe that they will communicate better because of the fact that they are in a relationship with this person and the depth of their personal knowledge and connectivity. (Schoenberg, 2011) All of this is based on the assumption that your significant other understands your intent even though your verbal and nonverbal signals are not matching up. So you two have to be cognizant of the nonverbal signals that you send to each other.Nonverbal cues can be categorized in to two sections: vocal and visual. The vocal side of nonverbal communication involves timbre (quality and tone), pitch (inflection), intensity (volume), tempo (speed), rhythm, and pauses (silence). Whereas the visual side of nonverbal communication involves your eyes, face, body posture, and hand gestures. â€Å"Before a person makes an attempt to form an interpersonal relationship, they must decide what attracts them to that person. There are many factors that make up attractions to other: physical attractions, perceived gain, similarities, differences, and proximity are a few of them. (Hybels, 2007) As you too were attracted to each other from the start, it is common with most people to be attracted to each other by the way they look, some people might have certain distinct characteristics that they find more attractable then others. Tall or short, blonde or brunette hair, blue or green eyes, muscular or slender, or even freckles are many things that attract us to one another but if there is no attractions, you are going to be less likely to walk up to someone and strike up a conversation them.For example, I am covered from wrists to neck to waist with tattoos and I have found that they inhibit my ability to have a good first impression on many of the professors that I have had over the last several years of college. I didn’t notice it at first but over time I saw that I received a warmer reception and instruction from my teachers when I had long sleeves on but if I gave the instructor time to get to know me. I could slowly start to show tattoos and it would not affect how the instructor acted towards me.On the opposite side though, I have met very interesting and smart people that had just as many tattoos as I did because of the shared similarities that we had. The similarities and differences can be a major factor in determining if a relationship will be good for a person because at times we will find ourselves attracted to people that share the sa me culture basis that we do. It is not a hard reach though to see why people are often attracted to people who enjoy the same things as we do but people can also be attracted to the differences in personalities. For example, people who don’t like making decisions might be attracted to a stronger decision maker. Because these characteristics complement each other, they might help strengthen the relationship. † (Hybels, 2007) So keep this in mind when you two are communicating with each other and it seems that what you are trying to send in not being received properly, as your nonverbal cues or bodily language might be sending something entirely different. As important as sending the right signals both verbally and nonverbally, effective listening is just as important in any relationship.When one listens to another, it shows that you respect them and care about what the other person is trying to communicate. There are three important types of listening and they are active , critical, and empathic. (Sole, 2011) Active listening is assertive communication that develops a sense of trust, were the person talking gets the feeling that you know what they are trying to communicate is getting to you. In doing this, you two will build a stronger bond and trust each other more in what you say and do.Critical listening is an analytical and rational process of listening, in where you analysis what is being said, process the information, and make a judgement on what was meant. After one has been in a relationship for a while the critical listening will not be needed, as empathic listening will tend to take over. Empathic listening is listening to your spouse when they have an issue or problem that they just need to talk about and know that you are there to listen.So when you empathetically listen, you set aside your own feelings and concentrate on comforting you spouse in their time of emotional need. Once you can use empathic listening in your relationship, you will be able to reflect on what is being said and respond back on the same emotional level of the person communicating but empathic listening is something that takes time in a relationship and you cannot force emotions but you can just be there for your spouse.It is obvious that you too have already made the initial approach to each other but there can be times in you relationship that you will have to make the approach again because a new or different situation has developed. So it is good to know that once we have approached someone, the next steps of forming an interpersonal relationship would be our motives for communicating. Your motives for getting married can easily be seen if someone spends just a couple minutes with you two and you guys fit the text book definition of what motivates us for forming a relationship.As â€Å"we are motivated to form relationships for many different reasons such as, pleasure, affection, inclusion, escape, relaxation, control, and health. † (Hybels, 2007) If one is motivated by pleasure, he or she might want someone to watch the same movies, listen to music, or discuss things that they have in common. If one is motivated by affection, then finding someone who will give you the â€Å"affective affirmation† that you need.Regardless of what motivates us, if we have started to develop a relationship we have to decide how much of our selves that we want to share and at what point in the relationship do we share it. Another factor that would have been considered as well would be the proximity of each other, as â€Å"proximity is the close contact that occurs when people share an experience such as at work, school, or play. † (Hybels, 2007) But seeing as you to met in college and studied the same major, your proximity was really close and you too were able to hare a lot of really neat experiences together and still continue to do so. Speaking of sharing with one another, I would like to explain self-disclosure to both of you. As â€Å"self-disclosure is a process in which one person tells another person something he or she would not reveal to just anyone. † (Hybels, 2007) Self-disclosure in not just providing someone with information about yourself. Self-disclosure is about revealing a piece of yourself that others would not normally know or learn about you over time.It involves trusting a person with your vulnerabilities when your risk sharing this information but it is also a way of gaining more information from the person you are sharing it with and you want to be able to trust each other and predict the thoughts and actions of your spouse. When one shares information like this, we are able to judge the reactions of our significant other. So once we share this information, we can learn how they think and feel on certain situations or topics that would not normally come up in normal day discussions.It is also implied that once he or she begins self-disclosure, the other will fol low suit. Thus causing a mutual disclosure and deepening the trust between two people in a relationship, knowing that they except you for who you are. While self-disclosure can strengthen a relationship it can also damage it as well but it is not called the intensifying stage for nothing because a relationship can be damaged if he or she is pouring out their soul to you and you don’t like what they are hearing or if the self-disclosure comes to early in the relationship, it can be just as damaging.There are five stages that we go through when developing and strengthening a relationship, these are the â€Å"coming together† stages. The first stage is the initiating stage, which is characterized by nervousness, caution, hesitation, and a very high risk of rejection. The next stage is the experimental stage, where we seek out any common interests, experiences, and life goals. It is in this stage that you might of talked about both of your education and career goals, when you might want to start a family, and what part of the city you wanted to settle down in.The third stage is the intensity stage in which the couple begins self-disclosure in an attempt to strengthen their relationship but also make it more vulnerable to each other. If you didn’t notice, when you two first started dating, your conversations were usually on positive topics in both of your lives but as time when on and you began to trust each other and build bonds. So when both of you felt comfortable in expressing your needs, fears, and desires; your relationship was strengthened and the two of you grew closer together as a couple.I don’t really think you two had an issues with this though, as you guys seemed to attach yourselves to each other after only a month had passed bye and the beginning and continued use of your pet names for each other made all of us sick but we were extremely grateful (kidding) when both of you got that summer intern job together. You two did c ome back a stronger couple though, so that summer really did bring you two together more, which led you into the fourth stage.The fourth stage is the integrating stage, in which the couple begins to communicate and respond easily to each others feelings. This is the point where your personalities began merging into one and we always saw you two together. I don’t think there was a single party or gathering that both of you were there for but you two made a cute couple and it was just expected after a time. The final stage would be the bonding stage. At this point, the couple will make some sort of commitment that announces their relationship to those around them,† (Hybels, 2007) involving a lot of commitment and dedication to the relationship and to each other. Whereas you two decided to get married and finally move into that small house you both were drooling over but you do know that once you two decide to have a baby, you will have to find a bigger house. In all of th e stages discussed we all have decision to make, we can either continue to move forward to the next stage, stay in the same stage we are in, or terminate the relationship all together.No matter what we as individuals choose to do with our lives, we need to know how to communicate effectively to that next stage and we need to know how to handle and resolve conflict in any relationship we place ourselves in. â€Å"We can do this by conflict resolution, which is negotiating to find a solution to the conflict. † (Hybels, 2007) Depending on how a conflict is resolved it can produce a positive or negative result but it also helps to take a positive approach to any conflict resolution, where discussion is considerate and on-confrontational, and the heart of the matter is on the issues and not on the individuals. If this can be completed, then, as long as people are willingly listening to each other and explore facts, issues, and possible solutions properly, conflict can often be res olved effectively. Making interpersonal communication just like any other work of life, meaning that it must be practiced and utilized regularly to be successful and we must continually analyze and study it in order to improve our ability to communicate effectively in relationships.So if you relationship is to last a long time and be a healthy and happy one, it is important to maintain a constant and consistent flow of communication with your partner (Sole, 2011). I wish the best of luck to both of you and hope your future endeavors bring you as much happiness as the last ones did. Sincerely, Aaron Stamper Reference Allis, R. (2002). Non-verbal Communication. Zeromillion. com. Retrieved from http://www. zeromillion. com/business/management/non-verbal-communication. html Hybels, S. & Weaver, R. (2007).Communicating Effectively. New York: McGraw-Hill Company Inc. Preston, P. (2005). Nonverbal communication: Do you really say what you mean? Journal of Healthcare Management. Retrieved f rom http://proquest. umi. com. Schoenberg, N. (2011). Can we talk? researcher talks about the role of communication in marriages. Houston Chronicle. Retrieved from http://search. proquest. com. Sole, K. (2011). Making Connections: Understanding Interpersonal Communication. San Diego, CA: Bridgepoint Education, Inc. Retrieved from https://content. ashford. ed.

The Dynamic Character Elisa in Steinbecks The Chrysanthemums

This essay of literary criticism is going to be on the Chrysanthemums written by John Steinbeck. This short story is considered to be one of the greatest short stories of all time. The author uses characterization to describe Elisa, she is a dynamic character. He shows us that she is a very lonely strong woman in the begging who wants to be loved. Who later changes because of this mysterious man. In this paper, I will prove that the author wanted to show Elisa as a dynamic character and how she changes through the story, from being strong and lonely in the begging, in the middle she because friendly talking to this man, and finally she gets all nice and dressed to go out In this short the Chrysanthemums, written by John stein beck. The†¦show more content†¦There is no affection and they don’t have a smooth relationship and Elisa is described as â€Å"Her face was lean and strong and her eyes were as clear as water. Her figure looked blocked and heavy in her gardening costume, a mans black hat pulled down over her eyes, clodhopper shoes, a figured print dress† (32-39). â€Å"this women harbors an unsatisfied longing for some way of life less settled than that of the rancher’s wife†¦.† (Kempton 322) Henry has little interest in her and her Chrysanthemums. Elisa doesn’t feel appreciated by her husband so she takes care of the flowers. She just wanted some affection from her husband through her gardening, now you’ll see how she starts to change after being shown some affection from the pot mender. Elisa not having any attention is in her gardening area when a mysterious man approaches her. Elisa is interested in this man. The man wants to fix something for Elisa but her being so strong she refused. So the man changes the tactics and shows interest in her Chrysanthemums. Elisa not being complemented about her Gardner and now someone says something so she begins to act differently toward the pot mender. She becomes attracted to this man and wants to do more then just be a gardener. The pot mender says something about her flowers and she feels appreciated. The pot mender leaves and her husband is ready to go out with her for diner, she now has confidence to go out. RightShow MoreRelatedThe Chrysanthemums And The Storm929 Words   |  4 Pagesâ€Å"The Chrysanthemums† vs. â€Å"The Storm† â€Å"The Storm†, was written by Kate Chopin, who was a feminist writer who insinuated that women had an unspoken sexual appetite and longed for independence. She wrote stories that were considerably taboo of her time, including â€Å"The Storm†, which was about a woman in a content marriage, longing for attention and excitement who leans on another man for it. On the other end of the American literature spectrum, there is John Steinbeck, who was also a feminist writerRead MoreAnalysis Of The Chrysanthemums And The Yellow Wallpaper By Charlotte Perkins Gilman1842 Words   |  8 PagesCharacters are an important literary aspect an author uses to communicate their message to their audience. There are multiple strategies an author uses to make their story more compelling and thought provoking. One strategy an author uses is to incorporate a dynamic character into their written work. A dynamic character is a character that changes overtime throughout a story due to confl icts that they encounter. Dynamic characters in a short story serve a purpose. Just the use of a dynamic character